Saturday, November 9, 2013

Baby weight race

I am standing in line with my groceries the other day and see the headline about Kim Kardashian's weight loss after baby. Immediately I am enraged. Why is this a "thing"? Why are women being told there is a race to lose the weight we gain while growing a human? In a society that puts a value on a thigh gap and sells the impossible dream of a 15-year-old body forever, how can mothers feel satisfied with our bodies?

Last night I was at a friend's house and we talked about baby weight. Here's what I had to say. Buy a bigger pair of jeans. Because it is exhausting trying to put on your old pair, only to hate yourself for not fitting into them. Buy a new pair and show off that sweet butt you have, thanks to a couple extra pounds of baby weight. You model that butt all over the room!

It's hard, in today's image obsessed society, to not have an issue with some part of your body. But while I may dislike my poochy tummy, I would hate it even more if my daughter thinks the size of her thighs is important. I realize it's hard to quiet the inner dialogue, but I need to at least try. I want my daughter to know that it is important that she is a good friend, compassionate, and brave. I need to recognize the things I am doing right now, whether it's with her or around her, are shaping her perception of the world. I stopped watching the Real Housewives because it's garbage television and it's not behaviour I want my daughter to think is okay. We go grocery shopping together and she picks out the fruit and veggies she wants. Unless it's onions. Then I say no. Because onions are gross. She is getting to pick which one piece of candy she has after dinner because chocolate is not the devil and she walked for an hour for that candy. And we tell her that we love her, because we do and that's what matters most at our house.

All the moms I know are different shapes and sizes, but it doesn't change the fact that they are amazing mothers who love their children. When I read about celebrity moms weighing themselves on 17 different scales, it makes me sad. And mad.

Let's teach our children to love their bodies by modelling that behaviour. Instead of dieting, I want to learn more and cook more nutrious, good food. Let's talk about what we like about our bodies (my freckles and my butt) and ask people, including our kids, what their bodies help them do (run faster, give good hugs). I want my daughter to know how she feels about herself is more important than how she looks. 

I would also like her to tell good jokes, but that's a personal preference ;)