Scary-led weaning

Baby-led weaning or BLW as it is referred to by some is the scariest shit I have ever done. Am doing, I should say. A little back story: I decided that in order to save time and sanity, I will not be making the 5-star Annabel Karmel style baby purees for Baby Macaroni, like I did with The Babe. It was time-consuming, labour-intensive and downright maddening if she didn't end up liking the batch I made. I also wanted to forgo the constant spoon feeding the second time around. I have a toddler to wrangle now, as well as myself to feed, so BLW seemed to be a way to do it all. The idea behind BLW is that babies join the family at the table and eat pieces of food by gumming the stick and finger-shaped pieces of food. Other than salty foods, honey, certain fishs and high fiber foods, every food is fair game according to the information I read.

So I bought the book, shopped for the groceries and away we went. And then stopped. And then started again, sort of. I gave Baby Macaroni half a red pepper to knaw on. She loved it! Success! Then she broke off a twoonie-sized chunk in her mouth and I panicked. I fished it out with my finger, a BLW no-no, and gave her back the rest of the pepper hesitatingly. The next night, a quarter of an apple. Same results. She loves the food, but gets mad when I take it out of her mouth. She gags on food, a BLW yes-yes, and my husband shudders. I posed a question on FB asking for tips and got some pretty helpful answers, but I still can't get past a nagging feeling that no matter what, a toast finger is a choking hazard. I also prefer to make her food rather than have her eat solely pouches of Superstore baby food. And there lies the problem. If I am terrified everytime I move outside the half Cheerio and steamed broccoli spectrum, is it really worth it?

Two nights ago I decided to be brave. After a few bites of cheddar cheese at lunch, we thought maybe a little cottage cheese at dinner would be a natural progression. Soft in nature, there would also be no choking hazard. What we didn't bet on was a reaction once the cheese and liquid touched the skin on her face, hands and legs. One trip to the emergency room later, which included an rather amusing conversation with a transient man, and we were given the all clear to go home and go to sleep. 

Now terrified of choking AND reactions, I am at a loss. Having a first aid kit next to me at the table while I gingerly give Baby Macaroni her next new fruit may be the only way we get through feeding her until she is 3-years-old. I sincerely hope not, but I just can't make any more damned baby beef bourginion which is destined for the blender.

~ H